Even as you are readingthis, many plucky, would-be inventors are dreaming, tinkering and hammering away in basement labs across the state. Their “eureka” moments are sure to make life so much better for us. Or not. Here are our favorite patents registered in the last two years.
Bikini Woman on a Bottle
(U.S. Patent No. D537,356)
For those whose priorities include drinking and ogling the female form, a big “thank you” should go to Tracey Scherer of Fort Atkinson. Taking a break from designing custom mufflers, Scherer said that this idea “came to him in a dream.”
Releasable Toilet Seat Assembly
(U.S. Patent No. D7,281,276)
That darn toilet seat is never clean enough, don’t you agree? Enter Erich Vierkant III of Sheboygan and Daniel Halloran of Saukville, whose invention allows you to pop the seat off, bring it to a sink and scrub every inch until it’s like new.
Race Car Winged Hat Attachment
(U.S. Patent No. D567,479)
Wausau’s Patrick Washburn was racing in the Sports Car Club of America’s Solo National Championship in Topeka, Kan., and noticed all the cars had wings on them, except his. One thing led to another and, voilà, a baseball cap with race car wings was the result.
Barbecue Grill having Race Car Styling
(U.S. Patent No. D551,489)
But for the full monty of racing imagery, what beats a barbecue grill that looks like a race car? Milwaukee inventor Mark Gondek’s biggest challenge was making sure the decorations didn’t burn off, so he made them out of porcelain.
Football Helmet Fishing Reel
(U.S. Patent No. D545,939)
The ultimate in sports hybridization, created by Slinger’s Michael Larson. The fishing line unspools through a hole – about where a player’s nose would be if this were an actual football helmet. Sure to attract any fish that are football fans.
Beverage-Holding Sweatshirt
(U.S. Patent No. D570,577)
The dilemma for sports fans: what to do with your drink when you want to cheer the team. Put it between your legs? Balance it on your shoulder? Whitefish Bay’s George Keppler has the solution. He notes the invention’s other advantage: two-fisted drinkers can now drink three beers at once.
Fruit-shaped fruit Fly Traps
(U.S. Patent Nos. D565,145, D564,061 and D561,865)
Courtesy of Bruce Studer of Germantown and Tim Jones of Phoenix, Ariz. We suggest you fill the apple trap with a combination of cider vinegar and vanilla. Once the bugs enter, they cannot fly out. If the traps don’t work, well, they look great in your fruit bowl.
