When did the vagina become such a scary place that certain people find themselves driven to destroy its magnificence? I know, I know…since I have a vagina I’m biased. But even so, I’m having a hard time understanding what the recent fuss is all about. Limited access to the pill? Vaginal probes? Sluts? Why make the vagina so unhappy? Is it to try to disprove the long-standing theory that when the vagina is happy, everyone is happy? Nah. It actually has nothing to do with caring about the vagina’s happiness. It’s about money. It’s about control. It’s about politics. And the one thing I’m trying to remember in this entire hullabaloo is what conflict really is at its core: a disagreement over change.
The reactions of one side fearing change, while the other welcomes change can be volatile. And name calling is almost always a sign of people fearing change so much that they lash out to put someone down in order to feel better, to feel some sort of control, to feel powerful. Ridiculous. When did calling someone names ever make you look strong in your convictions? Um, never. It makes you look like a bully. And the more name calling you do, rather than putting in the time to construct a well thought out argument, the more discrediting you will do towards yourself. This is pretty much the opposite of what you want to do to make a point. Just sayin’…
Along with name calling, trying to fearfully control change can come out dismissing, discounting, and/or discrediting the value or importance over why the change is needed in the first place. This sort of head-in-the-sand approach will say things like, “Why do we need this change? Everything is fine and folks who say otherwise are crybabies.” Since when has dismissing someone’s need ever worked out well?
All this talk about putting the vagina on notice just proves how powerful the vagina is. I mean, it has to be, look at how much attention it’s getting! The more people (usually without vaginas) who want to tell vaginas they shouldn’t have a say with what goes on to them, the more we should all pay attention to what is really going on. I would argue it’s really vagina envy.
Yes, yes. I’m asserting myself here and said “vagina envy.” Because let’s face it, vaginas are spectacular.
And that assertion, that boldness, is part of the reason why vaginas are getting all this attention. Because when women assert themselves, it’s a reminder to some that the world is changing and women’s voices are becoming stronger. Girl power has been on the rise and it’s clear some don’t like it because it is makes them feel inferior. I’m not 100% sure why; because honestly I don’t understand why anyone would limit themselves from knowing more about themselves and their world. But I know some would say it’s because girl power threatens some men’s strength paradigm. As these folks see it, strong women would most certainly mean a world with weaker men. The reality is strong women equal a strong world. In what kind of problem solving scenario does it matter if a penis or a vagina came up with the answer…say, curing cancer or saving a life? I’m sure every name caller wouldn’t give a damn what gender got it right in their case, just that they did.
And here’s the Sunday Boyfriend kicker…deep down, all the name callers know what is clear as the nose on your face: strong women are sexy. Hell yeah, halleluiah, that’s what she said: Sexy. And the strongest of men always surround themselves with strong women as friends, girlfriends, lovers, wives, partners, colleagues, supervisors, etc. because they know strength breeds strength. Strong women know this, too. So women who have strong voices and go after what they want are really only scary to those who feel insecure. So let’s start putting the insecure name callers on notice and force them to look at solving their own fears before coming out and recklessly discounting someone’s name.
If only the name callers knew their transparency…
And just one more thing I’d like to just, well, throw out there for consideration…erectile dysfunction medication.
For all this talk (and name calling) about making it harder for women to get the pill, a pill that also helps a slew of medical conditions and is more than just a pregnancy preventative, why aren’t the name callers talking more about making it harder for men to get hard when they want to? While I understand some ED medication was once on the table as useful heart medication, its purpose, its marketing hit-the-nail-on-the-head-point, is to remedy erectile dysfunction. And why are men talking this drug? Answer: To help them have sex when they want to. Hold on…isn’t this hypocritical? Yeah…yeah it is. Because I’ll tell ya, in all the Venn diagrams I’ve put together with the pill, ED medication, and certain name callers’ idea that sex’s only purpose is for conception; I have to tell you, it just doesn’t logically work without both the pill and ED meds in the same circle. But ED medication is nowhere in this hullabaloo, only the pill.
See…told you the vagina is powerful.
So let’s start working on overcoming fears before name calling. Vaginas aren’t all that scary. They do so much for all of us and I think the she deserves at least that much respect, don’t you? And let’s stop trying to define and control how, why, and how often mature, healthy folks have sex. We are sexual beings and it’s a natural thing to not only do, but want to do. And here’s my only caveat on this subject…you must be mature enough for sex to know that respecting yourself and others is just as important as pleasing yourself and others: this means use your brain and use protection. And I suppose that’s another thing that isn’t in the Venn diagram either, condoms. More hypocrisy. Damn that powerful vagina for leaving this in the shadows. No worries, I’m sure more light will shine down on the condom and help deflate the whole issue.
Here’s hoping all the vaginas out there are reminded just how powerful and magnificent they are.
As always stay comfy and be good to yourself and all your Sunday Boyfriends. If you are looking for more Sunday Boyfriend information, be sure to check us out at our blog, our Facebook page, and Twitter.
