To an average vehicle, the Canadian Pacific bridge on Kinnickinnic Avenue near Becher and Bay Streets is just another part of the industrial landscape, but to a truck over 12’9” trying to squeak under the “KK Can Opener,” as this bridge is known. Which might as well read “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here” to join the “low bridge” signs flanked on its steel frame. If a truck makes the wrong judgement call, they’ll find themselves stuck, crushed and mangled, facing heavy fines and license reviews.
One person who will never find themselves in such dire straits is Sally Nordstrom, proprietor of a service called Sally’s Oversized Escorts. She chose the cheeky name because “nobody forgets it,” she laughs. Nordstrom’s business guides oversized truck loads to their destination. Nordstrom and crew ride ahead of the truck in a vehicle with a test pole to be sure the truck behind will clear power lines– and bridges. They follow a route approved by city engineers to make sure they don’t use roads too weak, narrow, or with overhead obstacles.
So why do so many go wrong where Nordstrom goes right?
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“The trouble is the truck drivers are not what they used to be,” Nordstrom says.
She points out a huge problem in the industry – companies that are known as “chameleon carriers.” Which often operate from Eastern European countries like Serbia.
“Trucking is a completely different enterprise over there,” says Nordstrom. “A lot of it is run by the mob and they think they can get away with things here like they do over there.”
Similar companies also come from Asia. They employ drivers that often don’t understand English or the American measurement system, coupled with tight deadlines and long hours, so many are distracted drivers. Unlike Nordstrom’s company, they ignore approved routes and rely on GPS systems that will lead them straight into the jaws of the KK Can Opener.
“There are so many fly-by-night trucking companies that have so many wrecks, the feds shut them down, but they just declare bankruptcy and start up another company,” said Nordstrom. “They’ll falsify insurance information and commercial driver’s licenses and go on their way.”A quick name change and they’re back on the road in no time.
Once a vehicle does get stuck, it’s a long day to clear up the mess for everyone involved.
“When the police come out, they’re going to call truck enforcement who are going to find out everything they can about that trucking company,” Nordstrom says. Depending on exactly what they discover, it could lead to thousands of dollars of fines and revoked licenses, and that doesn’t begin to account for vehicle damage.
Joseph Paul works at the repair shop of Heiser Trailer Sales in West Milwaukee. He’s familiar with the KK Can Opener’s handiwork and says at his shop alone they’ve seen about three victims in the last year or so.
“If trailers have a load on them and they go under a short bridge like that, it can snap the trailer in half,” Paul says. “We’ve had some drivers go under and it skins the top front to back; the damages can total anywhere between a few thousand dollars if it’s not that bad, all the way to 15 to 20 thousand dollars if it’s pretty extensive.”
All of this has made the bridge a folk legend. Local band Two and a Half Stars was recently inspired to write a 40 second micro-ballad about “the little bridge with a big appetite,” and there’s a dedicated KK Can Opener Facebook page with over eight thousand followers that is a clearinghouse of photos and video clips of bridge crashes. In the last couple months, they’ve documented four wrecks.
One set of photos depicts a typical Can Opener pose– a truck wedged slightly sideways, its wheels dangling off the ground on one side. Another video clip shows a truck slowly entering the bridge on one side and emerging from the other with its roof missing, almost like a magician’s stage illusion.
When we attempted to contact the KK Can Opener page on Facebook, we got an unexpected reply… from the bridge itself.
“This is the bridge’s human. You can DM the bridge directly, I help him to read human writing and then replies with what he tells me,” the message read.
Hmm. Ok, we’ll bite. Why so many trucks, Bridge?
“I eat trucks for the taste. Aluminum is delicious and crunchy, canvas tarps sparkle on my lips and I love fiberglass splinters,” was the reply. “I usually eat 6 to 8 a year. The more I eat, the better I feel, I like trucks for every meal.”
A sentient bridge and a poet. But how can truckers avoid becoming the next meal? Nordstrom says it comes down to what many would hope are five words of common sense:
“If you’re not sure, stop.”
