Sh-t People Say on Capitol Hill

Sh-t People Say on Capitol Hill

The environment around the U.S. Capitol is a rarefied mix of dehydrated tourists and highly starched power suits, and it’s amazing the sort of hobnobbing you can catch in passing. Presented below are some 22 examples collected on Wednesday – statements uttered by real people working actual Capitol Hill jobs, and all within the space of just a couple of hours. (Statements were edited so as not to be identifiable.) I didn’t know anything about Indian Affairs until this hearing. We still haven’t defined what an energy bill is. Do you want money? Do you want change? What do you want? I’m sorry,…

The environment around the U.S. Capitol is a rarefied mix of dehydrated tourists and highly starched power suits, and it’s amazing the sort of hobnobbing you can catch in passing. Presented below are some 22 examples collected on Wednesday  statements uttered by real people working actual Capitol Hill jobs, and all within the space of just a couple of hours. (Statements were edited so as not to be identifiable.)

I
didn’t know anything about Indian Affairs until this hearing.

We
still haven’t defined what an energy bill is.

Do
you want money? Do you want change? What do you want?

I’m
sorry, I just have to stay on top of some things that are happening.

I
don’t agree with the cuts, but I think we’re going to be better off the further
this bill gets through the process.

She
didn’t work for me, but she always treated me like she did. It was cute.

It’s
not a park; it’s a garden, a beautiful, private garden.

Did
you see that she was crying in the meeting? She was starting to cry.

You
need to have an exit strategy.

Part
of what I love about this job is that you and me can block off an entire
afternoon, lock the door and just figure this out.

You
got a dime holding up a dollar.

Do
they have water? I don’t want to be a brand guy.

They
didn’t have an opportunity to get wired and coordinate what they were going to
say.

You
always have somebody above you, even when you’re in the top spot.

What
surprises me is how flustered and stunned they become when you fight them with
facts and rationality.

That
was good enough to cook him.

He’s
going to run for president some day.

Everyone
back home is so excited for us.

When
things go wrong, there needs to be some accountability. They’re getting away with
murder.

We
had a meeting with the mayor of Honolulu, who I love.

I
believe that there are evil spirits.

There’s this horrible story about a Russian girl or whatever.

Matt has written for Milwaukee Magazine since 2006, when he was a lowly intern. Since then, he’s held the posts of assistant news editor and, most recently, senior editor. He’s lived in South Carolina, Tennessee, Connecticut, Iowa, and Indiana but mostly in Wisconsin. He wants to do more fishing but has a hard time finding worms. For the magazine, Matt has written about city government, schools, religion, coffee roasters and Congress.