Thank you, Tony La Russa.
You’re one of the greatest managers in baseball history. Your record speaks for itself. Your Hall of Fame bust is secure.
So with those credentials beyond reproach, thanks for unabashedly being you. For wearing the lone white hat in a sea full of black ones. For seeing past the illusion of mere light bulbs and staring into their cheating souls as they randomly blink directly at your team. And for never wavering in your long, Quixotic quest for justice.
Yes, thanks for bringing the mind games of European soccer to America’s national pastime. You may not know Sir Alex Ferguson, the manager of Manchester United, but you do a darn good impression of his psy-war antics. Sounds like you’ll find the Brewers to be tough targets, though, if Prince Fielder is to be believed: “We’re here to win. All that fighting stuff is for the birds.”
Hey, aren’t Cardinals birds?
Oh, and much thanks for playing along with Greg Matzek, the WTMJ-AM 620 host who peppered you with those questions about Tuesday night’s baseball bedlam. Had to be the most fun Greg’s had since “Beg, Borrow and Deal 2.”
Sure, some folks might think Matzek got the best of you, but you should get credit for being so prompt with your corrections. Otherwise, we’d still have the mistaken impression that you think Miller Park’s faithful are indeed idiots rather than the cherished fans whom you hold in such high regard.
And a long-overdue thanks for rewriting the Golden Rule. You explained it quite clearly, and you’re absolutely right. Do intentionally unto others as they have accidentally done unto you should be the foundation for all civilized people.
Because it’s true. Albert Pujols is too valuable a commodity to suffer the burden of inside pitches, be they accidental or not. Like you said, he might suffer a fractured jaw or a broken hand. So clearly, the only way to express your deep concern for player safety is to endanger the safety of other jaws and other hands.
We’ll just ignore what might happen if another manager happens to think the same way you do.
It won’t be Ron Roenicke, of course. Pretty sure the Milwaukee manager is above that type of stuff. So thanks for reminding Brewers fans of their own skipper’s character.
But most of all, Tony, thanks for taking what was already sure to be a great pennant race and turning it into an extraordinary one. Assuming your Cardinals can keep pace, that is.
Yes, thanks for making this a rivalry that will have Milwaukee clinking its collective beer mugs throughout the rest of the summer. Thanks for ensuring that even the most casual Brewers fans will care passionately about beating your Cards for the NL Central crown. Because when this town gets behind a team, it’s quite the sight to behold.
So thank you for doing your part, Tony. And thanks for making it more fun to watch the Brewers do theirs.
Feel free to follow me on Twitter, where I tweet as howiemag. And listen to me chat sports with Mitch Teich once a month on WUWM’s “Lake Effect.”
