When composer and pianist Haskell Small suffered a severe stroke in February 2021, he thought he’d never be able to walk on his own or use his left hand, much less play the piano again. Small went through grueling rehabilitation both physically and musically as he lost the function of his left foot and, more devastatingly, his left hand.
“I was absolutely terrified I wouldn’t be able to use either my foot or hand again,” Small said. “The first thing I said to my wife, Betsy, as I arrived at the hospital was, ‘My life was over.’ I couldn’t move my left hand at all. I managed to lift one finger just a little bit.”
Small has since recovered the use of both and will continue his Celebration of Healing concert tour at Milwaukee’s Charles Allis Art Museum on Saturday, Nov. 18. Small will exclusively perform Beethoven’s Diabelli Variations around the United States during his 2023-24 concert tour.
It’s time to pick your Milwaukee favorites for the year!
The piece is a set of variations for the piano written between 1819 and 1823 by Ludwig van Beethoven based on a waltz composed by Anton Diabelli. Why did Small select Beethoven’s work for his return to live performances?
“First of all, this is one of the greatest works in the piano repertoire,” Small said. “It’s monstrously difficult. At the same time, it’s beautifully slow, sublime and spiritual. It’s a huge piece. It takes a little over an hour to play it all. I like to play it straight through. It’s a confluence of pieces with 33 takes or portions of it.”
Small still has some physical issues, saying he walks funny at times and his speech can be a little off every so often. He said he never gave up his desire to play the piano. Before he could return to touring, he had to learn to play again.
“The process to recovery from a stroke is to be very patient and disciplined,” Small explained. “Whether it be learning to walk again or playing piano again. I had to rewire my brain – rekindle synapses that were killed by the stroke. On my way back to health, my musical therapist had me play extra slowly.
A lot of what a pianist, or any musician, does is muscle memory. Small’s music therapist thought he would be better off learning new work – material he hadn’t known before the stroke – forcing Small to use other areas of his brain rather than rely on muscle memory.
Small said the Romantics are a challenge. “Franz Liszt is a handful. Chopin is difficult, and of course my main endeavor with this show, Beethoven.”
Just a year after the stroke, Small resumed presenting live and virtual performances of music by great classical masters that he arranged for the right hand alone, as well as his own composition Diary of a Stroke: The Adventures of Herb and Pete. “Herb and Pete are names I gave my left hand and foot,” he explained. “We were in rehab, and a couple of the nurses and I just started joking around.”
Small’s discography includes recordings of his own solo piano and chamber compositions, as well as the Goldberg Variations by J.S. Bach, Música callada by Federico Mompou and piano transcriptions of works by George Gershwin. “I prefer the soothing melodies,” he said. “Even on this Beethoven piece, parts are calming, and some are energetic and spiritual.”
It may come as a surprise to learn a touring pianist doesn’t excel at reading music. “I can read music, but I’m not that strong,” Small said. “It’s about getting something into muscle memory. I just can’t whip off thinking that fast. It has to come from somewhere else.”
His family goes back four generations in Washington D.C. where he and his wife still live. “My father loved music but had a tin ear. He loved opera and was always playing music around the house. It made me forever hate opera. He played the violin and tried to sing. It was painful,” he joked.
Small’s mother was a trained jazz musician who studied at the Peabody Institute of the Johns Hopkins University. “I think jazz is largely intuitive, and I played by ear,” he said. “Both jazz and classical can be improvisational. There are certain bylines and rules in both, but there’s also a lot of freedom.”
Surprisingly, Small said he’s more confident in his playing ability now than he was before the stroke.
“With this particular Beethoven piece, I’ve been immersed in it, practicing 24/7,” he said. “I first tried it out three or four months ago and played it for my wife. It was a royal mess. I risked it by playing in a couple of house concerts. My Diabelli debut was at a major Philadelphia (concert). I messed up badly. I certainly don’t play anything perfectly, but it was bad.”
Small said he messed up the piece in the middle and faked it by glossing it over. Almost nobody else in the audience would have noticed with the exception of a few people, he said.
On this tour, in addition to Milwaukee, Small is going to Madison and Chicago. After those performances, he’ll take some time off and resume the tour in California in April next year.
“I’m psyched to go on this tour,” Small said. “It’s been a lifelong endeavor. After my stroke, I told myself I’m going to play this Beethoven piece before I leave this earth.”
